The Idiotarod is coming

By Aaron Short

Don’t be alarmed if you step outside next weekend and see monsters with shopping carts running by your stoop — it’s just the Idiotarod.

The famed third jewel of the hipster Triple Crown (after SantaCon and the No Pants Subway Ride), the eighth annual costume-themed shopping cart race will be unleashed through Brooklyn’s frozen tundra paths this Saturday.

Beginning at 10 am, three dozen teams will push elaborately decorated carts to be rewarded with the adulation of their peers and drink specials.

The ultimate prize, Best In Show, is awarded not to the fastest team, but to the troupe that best embodies the Idiotarod’s free-wheeling spirit.

Last year, the all-female Fakewerk caught the judges’ eyes in sexy snow bunny costumes, pushing a cart that roasted marshmallows over an open flame.

Not to be outdone, two-time winner, the 60-member team, Dangerzone, deployed an ancient Roman-style fleet of “chariots” and “infantrymen” to capture the prize in 2009.

This year, the five-member team, Disasterpiece, 2010’s best costume winners, hope to secure top honors with their Ronald Dahl-esque, “Monsters Under the Bed” motif (pictured).

Teammates Rachel Brill, Emily Ente, Eric Sipra and Stephen and Paul Schaffenberger have spent three weeks fashioning giant paper mache monsters out of chickenwire and hundreds of copies of The Brooklyn Paper.

“Every year our costumes get more cumbersome and difficult to maneuver in, but, damn, we’re going to look fabulous,” said Ente.

Three members of the team ran in the marathon this past year, making them a favorite to finish in the top five, though multiple layers of primer, glue and spray paint that make their costumes highly combustible and vulnerable to open flame.

We may need to change our theme to ‘Monsters under the bed — on fire,’ ” said Stephen Schaffenberger.

“But we’ll be very warm,” added Sipra.

Idiotarod details are sketchy. E-mail corpxracingdivision@gmail.com for info.